Tuesday, May 31, 2016

PET Scan Day




It was PET Scan day! The only reason I looked forward to this scan is because I'm getting closer to knowing what the treatment plan will be. There's nothing worse than not knowing what the future looks like, especially when dealing with cancer. 

The entire biopsy results came in, apparently it is not a cancer recurrence. The receptors are negative this time, which means there's a possibility I can just do a pill treatment; fingers crossed! However, this means all the testing I did last year, MRI included, never picked up the different cancer. It's difficult to believe how these huge expensive machines, and intense treatments can miss cancer cells. But there's no point in dwelling on the "Why". 

I'm choosing to see the bright side in all of this, and one of the people that always makes me feel better is my husband. Coming home after a long day of painful finger pricks and injections, and seeing his notes on our white board melts my heart. That alone motivates me to fight for my life, harder than ever before. 

Now we wait, until next week...

Friday, May 27, 2016

Here We Go Again...

It's been months since my last post and a lot has happened. I've tried time and time again to write, and failed each attempt. I fell under depression, and was really confused as to how I was supposed to live after Cancer. I was miserable at work, and thought a lot about a career change. I was also in a lot of physical pain, getting worse and worse as the weeks passed by. Something I kept asking myself was, where does the paranoia end and the cancer begin? I reached out to my doctor and was told I shouldn't worry, three months later she was wrong. 

I was diagnosed with cancer for the second time on Wednesday May 25, 2016. I'm as distraught as the first time, but I'm mostly angry. Angry at the the fact that doctors don't listen to me or take my worries seriously. I'm angry at how careless they are, even though our lives are in their hands; and they know this. But I refuse to let cancer take me, I'm prepared to fight this stubborn disease again. I will face it without fears, as God is more powerful than anything in this world and He is by my side. 

With that being said, I will document every step of treatment on this blog. If someone reading this is going through the same thing, I want you to know you're not alone. My only hope is to be able to give others strength to keep fighting...we will beat this, we will win.